Living Through FASD

-

 Hello, if you're wondering what FASD is I will try to explain in regular words it stands for Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, it all starts when you're in the womb and the mother drinks. No amount of alcohol is safe for the baby when you are pregnant. My birth mother drank while pregnant leaving me and my brother with a life long disability. FASD affects everyone differently as you will not be neurotypical as when the baby's brain is developing in the womb your brain will be wired differently than the general population. FASD is easiest to think of as brain damage. It can leave you with difficulty with daily living, self-regulation, executive functioning, learning disabilities and so much more. There is still a lot of misunderstanding around FASD not a lot of people understand when I am having trouble coping it will show as poor behaviour. Honest, I am not being bad I am just showing you in the only way I know how I am unable to cope. 

Many people wanna help us but they don't know what to do most of the time, most of the people trying to help us cope and calm down don't know what strategies to use with us. This because they get most of their strategies for typical people and with FASD and PTSD we are not like others; we can't just heal or calm from common strategies that work for others.

I get so frustrated with people saying they don't understand us and why we act so bad, I even tell them what goes on with us. I also hate the professionals who think they know shit I bet y'all feel the same, those know it alls who don't listen. It's just not right saying you know how to handle us, you professionals really don't. There should be actual in-depth courses, not just books that say facts that based on the rest of the population. You really want to complicate things mix FASD and trauma both conditions early in life affect the developing brain which is really scary as both these conditions will affect you for the rest of your life.

Now just because you have FASD or experienced trauma in your life does not mean there is no hope for you, it just means you will often try harder to succeed with your daily life, All I ask for is a little understanding and compassion that some days people like me need a break and a little empathy. I admit, I have picked up a school desk, swore at my friends smashed things or ran out of my class cause I was being bad I just couldn't cope then. People just don't understand how a smell, sound, flashing light or almost anything can put me at another time in your life where really bad things were happening to you. FASD, PTSD are not things that allow you to control your emotions all the time but with help and understanding I know I will be able to reach my full potential in my life.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sorry, here I go again, it has been too long.

-
 I have not written in so long again, life has not been kind and I have been trying to look after myself. I have so much started for my blog, and just as much not finished. I try to write and some how I feel enormous shame, that I am such a mess and I can not think to write. I was to write how grade 11 ended as things were not going too well and my school team was struggling so much to support me with so little understanding of FASD and what that support would be like to give me real help any of us with FASD deserve. I can't say they did not try, but they really do not understand FASD or coregulation and then things really started to fall apart after I was raped. No one could help me including myself, being violated  in that way is so personal and leaves you with feelings I am still trying to come to terms with. I ended up putting myself into a program away from school where I could get a quieter environment, away from all the questions about what had happened to me.  Yet...
Read more

Seattle Washington 9th International FASD Conference

-
I had been looking forward to attend the 9th International FASD conference in Seattle, Washington for quite a  while, each day building in anticipation. This  because I wanted to be able to share my experiences, strengths and challenges living with FASD. Then to be able to relate my story to other peers, adults and family's so they understand just cause I am on a stage speaking I am not perfect and have lots of struggles in my life, as does my family. I have also always wanted to travel around the world and share my lived experiences, strengths, victories and difficulties living with FASD, so others understand they are not alone in their experiences. For some time, I have been going through a rough patch, feeling lost and very frustrated; why is this you may ask? Well, I wish I knew completely... There are the challenges of living with FASD, the all to common mental health issues, learning disabilities, lack of understanding, lack of supports and more and just being different ...
Read more

FASD, school and mental health, the need for a Federal or Provincial bill to change things.

-
 So as Youth Accessibility Leader I get to hear about things, seminars, conferences, meetings, funding for projects all kinds of things. One of those things was with the Youth Policy and Partnerships Unit of the Public Health Agency of Canada, Government of Canada who helped me to promote FASD and mental health awareness in school. It sounded really exciting at the time as I am convinced a lot of the mental health issues those of us with FASD have are because we live in a society that does not understand invisible disabilities.  It is strange with a few accommodations those of us with FASD can thrive and do our best but meet up with those people who do not understand and prefer to blame or shame us and life can become really difficult destroying our self worth and confidence. When I first got into this project I was so sure everyone would want to learn and listen as so many say they are interested and want to know what to do to help. Yet by the end of the p...
Read more