My Journey Through Trauma, PTSD While Living With FASD

A bit out of date but these blogs take me a while. Grade 11 started out great, but Christmas is coming soon,  grade 11 just sucks now I just don't know who I am anymore. I have been on psychotropic medication for a while now and my dose just keeps getting increased like this will help me, this was done to me before and it never helped then either but the professionals insist. I just hate myself, I feel so disconnected from everyone, and everything, there seems to be nothing that ties me to this generation, where did the self-reliant country people go. I hate who I am becoming the girl my parents would have never wanted, I'm rude, I'm mouthy, I'm loud, and worst of all I'm disgusting. I know Shelby and I am not that girl anymore, I was a cute kid, quiet and had a bit of attitude which is normal for a girl but I am no longer the girl my parents adopted.  I just don't know what is wrong with me but I have been sitting here in the halls of my school crying for hours...

 So about 8 months ago I got a job at Giant Tiger, it has been very stressful as this is my first actual job besides babysitting. Everybody is a little different, including me, and I have been getting used to the rules, and the people there. Sometimes I get thrown off by the way people talk to me, and it leaves me hanging and upset. Sometimes I take things too seriously, but lately, I have been doing a lot better not getting mad and storming off. Half of the reason why I think I am somewhat doing better is I am too mentally, physically and emotionally tired to give a damn about things and people, but that is another story for my blog.  A job may tend to be harder and more stressful for those of us with FASD, a lot more then for other people or it may be super easy, FASD affects people differently as our brains are all wired differently. So if we ask for help or ask for something to be explained multiple times, we are not dumb, retarded or a sped. We are just as smart as all th...